Rear Window: Outside Looks In

Ewww...I just went to close my window and as I was fiddling with the screen, some pervert in a trench coat started waiving to me. Whereas normally I welcome lechery, this time I just frowned and closed my curtains. Okay, maybe he was not a pervert per se, he kinda looked like a business man and had just stepped out of an Audi, but he managed to violate my spatial boundries. I become the Object of the Gaze, and he became the voyeur. This is a facsimilie of what he looked like. Have you seen this man?

All this without even leaving my house...which is what I'm about to do now. I'm submitting myself to patriarchy and going out for dinner avec le frat. I am underdressed, but so resourceful: as I was straightening my hair, I noticed the satin ribbon on my pants was crinkled and gave it a little run-over with the flat iron. See, I may attend an Ivory Tower university, yet I manage to retain some tactical street smarts.

In other news, I found a perfect applicant to fill my personal assistant position:No, ladies, you can't borrow him.